Why Joel is a Jackass part 3

I could go on forever but this is going to be the last post about this. Joel is a jackass because on my first Christmas Eve here in 2003, alone and about 6 weeks pregnant, he told me "I'm NOT in love with you." He thought he should be honest, he said. I was a complete mess the rest of the day. This is a few days or so after he gave me a belated birthday gift: a Phillips Sonicare toothbrush. And this is also a few days or so after I was scheduled to terminate the pregnancy, but I changed my mind and told him so. He had given me $400 cash too. He's a jackass for not wanting a baby, for not wanting it with me, for not wanting to marry me. He's a jackass for not caring for me better during my pregnancy, for letting me shovel my driveway in April 2005 after a blizzard hit, for all the crap he did and all the things he should have done while I was on bedrest for two months. Now he has a gorgeous, sweet 20-month old son whom he loves to pieces and adores, and I can't help but always think 'yeah, he wouldn't even exist if it weren't for me.' Jackass! He is out of town this week in Montana, so I have my breathing space, thank Goddess.

On another note, I drove down to Cherry Creek School District offices today to pick up a hire packet. I applied online for regular teacher jobs and as a substitute. Afterward, I got a little lost trying to find the Arapahoe County Sherriff's office to get my fingerprinting done and didn't make it there in time. From there it took only five minutes to get to Park Meadows mall where I spent 4 hours shopping and didn't even make it to The Limited. We arrived at 5 o'clock, and first Ty and I used the restroom and ate some Renzio's gyro, Greek potatoes and spinach rice. It was soooooo good! They give you a ton of food too. We went to babyGap, Gymboree, Dillards, Macy's, Franklin Covey, Nordstrom, and finally Banana Republic. We got clothes! I was slightly depressed knowing I couldn't really afford to buy new clothes, but all I got was a short-sleeve spring blouse from Macy's, 3 pairs of DKNY panties from Nordstrom, and a pair of pants, a skirt, a sweater and a short sweater shrug-like jacket from Banana. Ty got two shirts and a pair of jeans from Gymboree; how that came to $40 I do not know.

I am going to lay in bed now and read some from the book I ordered Sunday night/Monday morning that will help me answer all those dumb questions from the TeacherInsight survey that some of the school districts are using to assess teacher candidates when they apply for jobs. Well, that, and I think it'll be a good read, and I haven't purchased a hardback book in, oh, forever.